Walk into any store this time of year, and you’re bound to hear Christmas music blasting through the speakers. But what if you could literally feel the vibrations of those holiday tunes against your body as you masturbate or have sex? Thanks to the UK sex toy brand MysteryVibe, now you can.
Let us explain. This month, the brand added popular holiday carols to its library of vibration "patterns" users can choose from while enjoying its Crescendo vibrator ($179, amazon.com). That means this bendable toy that offers G-spot and clitoral action will now buzz to the beat of songs like "Jingle Bells" or "Deck the Halls" as you climax, if you choose.
The new holiday-themed vibration options are meant to be nostalgic and fun. “Love them or hate them, Christmas songs ignite a sense of excitement and joy in us all," MysteryVibe co-founder Samantha Alys said in a statement. "So we thought, imagine if we coupled that with the feeling of an intense orgasm?!” Naturally.
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To promote this festive new feature, MysteryVibe also released a video in which Alys asked Londoners to guess which carols the vibrator was buzzing along to. Once they got over the shock that they were holding a vibrator up to their ear in the middle of the street, they got into it, singing to standard holiday jams like "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" and "We Wish You a Merry Christmas," purple Crescendo in hand.
Even if you don't necessarily want to orgasm to "Jingle Bells," you have to admit the sex toy’s holiday-inspired vibration settings are kind of amazing. Did someone say, "All I want for Christmas is a Crescendo?"
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